Sta.sh
.
Four AM, something calls me from my bed
Coffee and cigarettes in the Quiet Time
Before the world awakes and begins its manic noise
Time to think, and feel, and dream
But you, you're always the first thing on my mind.
Scattered dreams still cling like cobwebs
Fading but not yet gone, mingling with the
Lights-on reality of the dark morning and its silence
While you were here I'd have simply thrown
An arm around you, and gone back to sleep.
The world changes, people leave
Never understanding what they leave behind
What an empty place a soul leaves when it exits this world
Beautiful dreams that shine in the sleeper
But dissipate into sad nothingness at Four AM.
..
Four AM. When the stars swarm on the cold breeze
Maybe they'll fly in through my open window
Maybe we'll have a cup, and then I'll fly back out with them
But probably not.
Fish sing silently in choppy green seas
Embers die loudly in the cooling fireplace
The earth is weighed down by the pounding of feet
But the four AM air is light, sharp, sweet
Elemental.
Flesh and bone only lasts so long before it's dust
But love goes on for eternity in some unknown place
If you listen carefully, you can hear the stars scream
I think I know why.
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And gorgeous.
I sense a change in your delivery, here.. more stake in explanations and words - and though no loss of your beautiful sceneries.
This time, I've lost sight of the mad man.
As I look at the top of it I also see the number of messages in my inbox, which happens to be 911 - there's an interesting coincidence.
You said you were done editing and it doesn't need anything but do you want a couple grammar fixes? If so, if so - "went" in 2:5 should be "gone" - and in 1:3 "constant" needs a look, something that is constant can't begin, it never stopped.
Just little things. It's a very moving piece of writing.